The Pickle Jar

I recently heard some newly-wed advise my grandmother gave my mom. It's quite profound yet so simple. She learned this and has been married 60+ years so I thought I'd pass it on.

"I always ask him to open the pickle jar."

And she does. Every time I'm there she always asks my grandfather to do this for her, even if I'm standing right there in the room with her. Her reasoning? Every man needs to be needed. Be at a vulnerable place and ask him to fill in the gaps. Let him complete you.

Sometimes I need this reminder. It can be too easy for me to try to do things on my own without asking for my husbands help and I get in more trouble than when I started. This can be without me realizing asking him would have been easier and faster than all the energy I spent trying to do it on my own. Or sometimes I know I can do it on my own, and I purposefully choose to do it anyway just so show him I'm perfectly capable...or to show him my way is better. I just say I'm a "go-getter" in a prideful way that "if there is something that needs done, I do it."

While I know that there is certainly a place for that. But wasn't this woman's original sin in the garden? Eve thought that her own agenda was pleasing to the eye. And yes, man did sin here too, but would the story have been different if Eve followed Adam or consulted with him before eating the fruit.

I've started taking this approach as far as letting Angel know that I need him. I can take all 3 kids swimming on my own no problem. But they have so much fun when he comes with us. And I can relax more when he is with me. And this is true with so many other things. I just want him to know that I love and need him. So I ask him to open the pickle jar. =)