Pregnancy Update

Well, here it is. Finally. What you have been waiting for. A pregnancy update. Let me just warn you before you keep reading. It's gonna be honest. And it might not make sense. It might not flow like my usual posts. It's random thoughts. But if there's anything else you really want to know, just leave me a comment and I'll do my best at giving a better answer.

I'm am so excited to be counting down the weeks until our little one joins our family! Today, we are officially at the 5 week countdown! YAY! Thankfully, however, the time is not here yet. I do not feel ready.

I want to hold him, I can't wait to snuggle with him, and I'm dying to see what he looks like. But I'm not ready.

Wanna know what we "have" ready for the baby? Let me remind you that Alisia is turning 10 this summer and Caleb is turning 6. There's no way we could keep bulky baby stuff stored while we are renting for all these years. We have a pack-n-play. We're just planning to let the baby sleep in our room for now. I think I may have saved a bin of baby clothes after Caleb was born. It might be in storage somewhere in my parents attic. I still have to check. I picked up a few onsies at a yard sale last week. A baby doesn't need much, right? Right? ::sigh::

I'm trusting. Trusting that God knows every need this little one will have. I'm praying. Praying that God will provide.

School's coming to an end. Homework. Studying. Tests. Spring concerts. Plays. Field Trips. I want to enjoy these moments with Caleb and Alisia and not rush through them. I've struggled with not being able to be a part of every moment and every field trip, but am learning to say yes when I can, and let "no" be ok sometimes. I'm learning not to promise things I can't do.

I'm learning. Learning what it means to entrust my kids to Him. And praying that God will mold my heart to His will.

Work is on-going. Meetings. Home visits. Training. Documentation. Trying to squeeze everything in before maternity leave. Praying for strength. Leaning on the ever-lasting arms.

Tired. By the end of the day, I'm too tired to tackle my "to-do" list and it just keeps getting longer and longer. Praying for peace. Trouble sleeping. Short fused. Praying for patience. Trying to depend on Him in my weakness and begin every day in prayer.

Oh, have I mentioned we're in the process of buying our first house?

Yeah. That too. Praying for wisdom. Praying for His will. Praying that He will guide us and he will close the doors if it is not his will. We're actually buying my parents house, the house I grew up in. We close at the end of the month. We have to wait until they move out before we can move in. Praying that the house will be used for his glory. He is providing it to us. We want it to be used for him. All of it. Every day.

Trying to pack. Yeah right. More like thinking about packing.

Finances. Praying. Trusting God.

Making plans and arrangements for our summer missions trip. Praying.

Trying to keep our calendar organized and updated so I don't forget things or overbook. Trying to keep some time open for family. And time for my husband. Just us.

Back to the still nameless baby. Oh yeah, he's still nameless. I'm not ready.

Praying for health. Thankfully I've been feeling well health wise. God has really blessed me through-out this pregnancy with no complications. Thankyou, Lord. There's something so comforting knowing that the little one inside is still part of our family now, and I don't have to worry about what will happen with all the rest.

Learning. Trusting. Leaning. Praying. Clinging to the cross. Clinging to what I know to be true and steady. God. Unchanging. My Provider. My All.

"The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God stands forever."
Isaiah 40:8